The rise of the roller children

In collaboration with Proline.

Is it just me or do children mainly transport themselves using wheels these days. Over the many years I’ve been on Gods green earth, I’ve seen a whole evolution of wheeled children. The first time I began to notice this was when I was out shopping for my weekly wine stock, when suddenly out of nowhere, I glimpsed from the corner of my eyes, the top of small child’s head zipping past me. Now, not much usually distracts me when I’m maticulously in search of the ‘better than half price’ wine promotions but this intrigued me. I had to find out who this child was and how he was floating so delightfully around the aisles of a supermarket. After further investigation, it appeared said child had wheeled feet. No, no he didn’t… that’s ridiculous. No, he had wheeled SHOES. Who would invent such a thing… as if children aren’t fast enough in the supermarkets, who would then grace them with wheeled shoes.

It didn’t stop there though… we’ve had a whole phase of those snazzy folding scooters, wheelie ride on suitcases (I’m looking at you Trunki) and now… well now we’ve added electric to the mix with futuristic scooter hoverboard type contraptions. Now, I live in Salford so you can imagine how terrifying it is to see youths hovering around the local estates like ghetto spaceboys.

Wheeled children… wheeled children everywhere.

To be quite honest, I’d love nothing more right now that to make rollerblades cool again… alas, that type of wheeled transportation is limited to those living in LA who wear tiny shorts and enjoy being pulled along by Chihuahuas. Not so much for a single mum of 2 carrying Aldi bags for life and hair dry shampooed within an inch of it’s life.

But, if you can’t beat them… join them… ‘sneaks off to browse proline skates to see if they sell size 5 heelys’. Coming to a Salford supermarket near you… me, wheeled and ready for my wine shop. Who else is joining the revolution?

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